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Having close friends and family on whom you can count has far-reaching benefits for your health. Here's how to build and maintain these essential relationships.
By Mayo Clinic staffIt doesn't take a scientific study to show that surrounding yourself with supportive family, friends and co-workers can have a positive effect on your mental well-being, but there's plenty of research to confirm it. A strong social support network can be critical to help you through the stress of tough times, whether you've had a bad day at work or a year filled with loss or chronic illness. It's never too soon to cultivate these important relationships — and your social support network can never have too many good friends.
What is a social support network?
A social support network is different from a support group. A social support network is made up of friends, family and peers, while a support group is generally a structured meeting run by a mental health professional. Although both can play an important role in times of stress, a social support network is something you can develop when you're not under stress, providing the comfort of knowing that your friends are there for you if you need them.
You don't need to formalize your support network with regular meetings or an official leader. A coffee break with a friend at work, a quick chat with a neighbor, a phone call to your sister, even a visit to church are all ways to reduce stress while fostering lasting relationships with the people close to you.
Benefits of a social support network
The positive effects of a support network include:
- Sense of belonging. Spending time with people helps ward off loneliness. Whether it's other new moms, dog lovers, fishing buddies or siblings, just knowing you're not alone can go a long way toward coping with stress.
- Increased sense of self-worth. Having people who call you a friend reinforces the idea that you're a good person to be around.
- Feeling of security. By reaching out and sharing yourself with others, you have the added security of knowing that if you start to show signs of depression or exhibit unhealthy lifestyle habits, your friends can help alert you to the problem.
Cultivating your support network
The first step toward developing a strong support network is an evaluation of your own behavior as it relates to building and maintaining friendships. After all, relationships are a two-way street. The better a friend you are, the better your friends will be. Here are some suggestions for nurturing your relationships:
- Stay in touch. Answering phone calls, returning e-mails and reciprocating invitations let people know you care.
- Be proactive. Don't wait for someone else to make the first move. If you meet someone you think could be a good friend, invite him or her for coffee. Or be the one to strike up a conversation while in line at the grocery store.
- Know when to say "no" and when to say "yes." Spending time with people who aren't supportive can add stress and take away valuable time. On the other hand, don't decline an invitation because you feel shy or insecure.
- Don't compete. Be happy instead of jealous when your friends succeed, and they'll celebrate your accomplishments in return.
- Be a good listener. Find out what's important to your friends — you might find you have even more in common than you think.
- Challenge yourself. Keep looking for ways to improve. Maybe it's by complaining less, being more generous or forgiving others' faults.
- Don't overdo it. In your zeal to extend your social network, be careful not to overwhelm friends and family with phone calls and e-mails. Save those high-demand times for when you really need them.
- Appreciate your friends and family. Take time to say thank you and express how important they are to you.
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